The new Coldplay song is making the rounds, called "Every Teardrop is a Waterfall". Everyone's entitled to their own bad taste/guilty pleasures, so we won't judge if you dance along – but we've got a few things you might want to hear about the saviors of douche-rock while you're at it.
Coldplay are frequent targets of copyright claims, with song-theft accusations brought against them from Joe Satriani, Cat Stevens, Creaky Boards, and then once again with unknown songwriter Sammie Lee Smith. Hell, I've got a sneaking suspicion that those bastards might have even stolen from me.
The band have set themselves up for more accusations and claims with their latest single. The simplistic nature of the main chord design in "Every Teardrop is a Waterfall" suggests that they aren't exactly difficult to stumble upon, but does that excuse the derivative wimp-rock? Not necessarily, when the riff is pulled directly from a decade-old track by Mystic, entitled "Ritmo de la Noche". Listen to this bargain store Eurotrash club-bait nonsense for yourself and compare:
Here's the Mystic track, from a 2000 album called Grandmix: Summer Edition that contains, far as my ears can tell, the sounds of Vapid brand douche flowing from a neon river on Simon Cowell's estate:
As it turns out, both songs take cues from Peter Allen's comparatively awesome "I Go To Rio":
I feel dirty now. Time to wash this terrible sound out of my head. Who's got the Slayer?