Ten Great Trailers for Ten Bad Films (Part 1)

Unfortunately for audiences, even the worst movies can have awesome trailers.

William Bibbianiby William Bibbiani

This world is full of awesome movie trailers and fantastic movies. Too bad these two kinds of media don’t always go hand-in-hand. This is especially problematic when you see an awesome trailer in the movie theater and wind up seeing a major letdown of a movie. You feel burned by the movie studios, the talent involved, and that stupid Vanessa Carlton song that used to be in every movie trailer. Trust me, you are not alone in your sorrow. So, just because I can, I’ve come up with my list of 10 movies that had amazingly awesome trailers and wound up completely sucking balls. Enjoy!


SUPERMAN RETURNS

The inspiration for this list, Superman Returns may have one of the best teaser trailers of all time. I’d rank it up there with the Star Wars: Special Edition teaser and the trailers for The Lord of the Rings.  What made this trailer so stinkin’ epic was both the inclusion of Marlon Brando’s voiceover and the classic John Williams score.  It turns out that these two elements could have been placed over a mechanic changing a tire and the world would have gasped audibly. Ultimately, once we all got to see this movie, Superman Returns failed to deliver on the promise of this teaser. The movie isn’t as bad as something like Daredevil, but it still ranks as one of the worst big-budget movies of the decade.

 

PEARL HARBOR

Wow. So, I didn’t realize it until researching this article, but Pearl Harbor and Superman Returns pretty much have the same trailer. Epic score + old man doing a voiceover = the greatest teaser ever made. No more than ten years ago, Pearl Harbor was the heir apparent to Saving Private Ryan and the peak of Ben Affleck’s superstardom. While movie fans had reason to doubt Michael Bay and Jerry Bruckheimer’s track record, no one truly believed that they could sully one of the darkest days of our history, right? Right?! Oh yeah, well, they pretty much took a flamethrower to all of our ancestors who fought in the Second Great War. Hidden from this teaser were the major historical inaccuracies, the horrendous acting, and the gooey, oozy melodramatic acting that only Michael Bay can handcraft. Despite the great teaser, Pearl Harbor managed to be the worst wide release World War II movie of the decade.

 

THE MATRIX RELOADED

Talk about hype, The Matrix Reloaded (and Revolutions) may have been the most anticipated sequel since The Empire Strikes Back. When it was announced that The Matrix was getting a sequel, fanboys and girls drooled all over their keyboards and Entertainment Weeklys for any shred of news. Then, this teaser hit like a Howitzer destroying any brain cells that we had.  Too bad that the special effects were the only part to write home about. The Matrix Reloaded made a ton of money but confused and bored audiences across the globe. The Wachowski’s got too complicated for their own good and we were all left wondering why they couldn’t just leave Neo alone. This teaser showed a ton of potential and the movie delivered on none of it.

 

THE HITCHHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY

The editors of this trailer had the smarts to play around with the purpose of movie trailers in movies. Doing so, they explain what The Hitchhiker’s Guide is for and build up the hilarity that moviegoers should expect. This is one of the most clever trailers ever made. Too bad that the movie fell flat. The Hitchhiker’s trailer is a perfect example of the trailer editor having a better sense of humor than the filmmakers did. This happens from time-to-time and makes being a fan of trailers enjoyable but being a fan of movies painful. Hitchhiker’s Guide was not a good movie and has likely killed any chance of another Douglas Adams hitting the silver screen in our lifetime.

 

TROPIC THUNDER

I remember being stunned at how funny this trailer was when it was first released. Tropic Thunder presented the perfect riff on movies about filmmaking and doing so with in high quality.  In the trailer, Robert Downey Jr. destroys and Jack Black appeared to be far from annoying.  Unfortunately, when the movie was actually shown to the world two things became apparent: first, all of the funny parts were in the trailer. Second, Ben Stiller’s character, who is barely in the trailer, has almost nothing funny to do and drags much of the movie down. While I realize that this film does have its fans, I was seriously let down at how unfunny Tropic Thunder turned out to be.

 

Come back tomorrow to find out what other movie trailers made the list…!