Watch Out For Friend Zone Fiona

Welcome to the 10th circle of Hell. Fiona is the gatekeeper.

Geoffrey Goldenby Geoffrey Golden

A pretty girl talks to you. She seems to like you. Maybe she even touches your arm or smiles coyly at you. Yes, sex is on the way! Or… is it? She doesn’t seem interested in dating. She just wants to talk. She just wants to – brace yourself – just be friends. If you’ve been friend zoned, then you already know Friend Zone Fiona. Here’s a sampling of this funny meme:

 

My Ex

“Sweet” means “no.”

 

Sexy!

“Could you… maybe… lick the cartridge a little?”

 

Hit That

Suddenly, I hate this f***ing project.

 

Love

Wrong type of love! Wrong type of love!

 

Coffee

And the coffee wasn’t even that good! I mean… it was okay.

 

So Comfortable

Damn it, the friend zone speech decoder app is right.

 

Holding Hands

If only her purse was shaped like her hand… sigh…

 

Cuddling

It’s a start? Not really? Never mind.

 

Perfect Guy

Gah!

 

To Sum Up

Now to kill myself.

 

Geoffrey Golden is the Editor-In-Chief of The Devastator: The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans! Background image via.